Day 35

I covered Day 0 because I already started traveling, but I didn't count it as proper first day, because I wasn't traveling in India yet. Same way I count this day, despite being in India only for few last hours.

I decided not to sleep, because my flight was 3:40 and I had to be sufficiently earlier at the airport. That's why I didn't bother to leave early from the beach. Packing was a little bit challenging, with all these books now. As I thought earlier, I left my chappati, my hoodie and some other smaller clothes. However some fashionistas could be outraged, books were more important for me than old weary clothes. I wouldn't manage otherwise.

At the appointed time I went to the taxi. Road to the airport was quite long and although I knew about it now, it was hard for me to process due to Warsaw airports being basically in Warsaw, which probably is not the standard. I was passively looking outside, my mind already past the point of acceptance. When we arrived I spent my last cash to pay for the taxi. When I abruptly raised my backpack, shoulder strap slightly tore up. My books couldn't weight so much, I thought, and yet this happened. Crossing the security gates didn't take much time and I had some time to spend inside. I wanted to communicate with Nicha before I'll board the plane, because there will be big time gap before I'll be able to contact her again, but she was asleep. I left one more personal message, another farewell of sorts, but also simple information when I should have network again and that I'll contact her as soon as I'll be able. I called my mom to inform about situation. She came up with idea what to buy as a gift for that, she suggested to buy some alcohol in duty-free zone. Here is the thing, I always was vehement about not buying alcohols to others and I rarely break principles like that, but I felt that I got something special for my mom, but not for dad, so I was willing to break just this one time. What I discovered that in duty-free shops you could find alcohols from around the world, but not particularly from the place you are. I didn't expect what kind of alcohol from Kerala I could find. Toddy? But the only Indian alcohol I could find was some Goan whisky so I decided to buy that. Next I found bookstore and decided to buy more books, because I didn't have enough of them apparently. I wanted to buy books in malayalam this time, not translations. I asked bookseller about his opinions, but he was surprised and looked at me as if I'm crazy. Maybe I am crazy, but is it so weird to buy books in language of the place you just visited? i think the bookseller lady from yesterday would understand and recommend something. I bought Goat Days by Benjamin and one other book. I have no idea what's the second book about, but it had beautiful, unique cover and it was written by woman. That was enough for me.

The gate to the airplane opened with slight delay, but we didn't get any explanations. Otherwise everything felt smooth. After boarding the plane and the start of the flight I desperately tried to notice anything about the land I was leaving, any recognizable outlines, landmarks. But it was too dark to see anything. I wasn't able even to recognize when land vanished from sighted, because in all encompasing darkness there were no difference between the land and the sea. I just waited for my meal after which I tried to sleep at least a little bit. When I woke up I started to observe strange geometric patterns of street lights and ships in Emirates and I tried to separate waters from the land, but it was more exercise of imagination than observation. When we had stop in Sharjah I was surprise with coldness. When I was going in opposite direction I landed during the day and it was warm. My reason knew that deserts are hot during the day and cold at night, but I was already accustomed to South India so much that I expected nights warm as days. I had a little bit more time in Sharjah than last time, but not much. Enough for finding Indian restaurant and ordering masala dosa, one more time. When I ate I went to the gates and it came out that people already waited for me, even though theoretically there was still time before closing the gates and I was one of the last people to get there.

Travel from there to Poland at first seemed without any surprises, although I was looking at any sights of mountains and snow. But when we were in Poland already we learned that there is low visibility in Kraków and we are circling above it waiting for better weather conditions. It didn't happen and we started to run out of fuel so we had to land in different place, we flew to Katowice there for refueling. In Katowice I managed to contact my dad that we are waiting here, but they won't be allowing us to leave here and we will be going back to Kraków. My dad was angry, because he was already driving to Katowice and he felt misinformed at the airport. Eventually we started and very quickly returned to Kraków. It's interesting how insignificant such distances are for airplane, almost like effortless jump. After leaving airplane, I boarded airport bus which carried us to airport. In the bus, seeing family with blonde, blue eyed kids speaking Polish came to me like surprising revelation. It was such an atypical view, so exotic! It wasn't the end of delays. In the airport we were waiting quite a long time until our baggages were finally delivered. During waiting time I was just walking constantly around baggage carousel, walking always being my way to control my overthinking. I smiled to few Indian families there during waiting, I was feeling that I will be missing especially those smiles. When my backpack came, piece of plastic that was holding one of the backpack straps was broken so I had to crudely tied it, so I couldn't easily regulate it on one side. I wasn't happy with that slight damages to backpack, because I actually liked it and I hoped that it will serve me for long.

Just after leaving the airport it felt like if I would be hit in the face. Sudden experience of subzero temperature caught me of guard. Where all the warmth of the world suddenly disappeared? Just yesterday I was in the warm ocean and now I barely could stand in the open air. I had to wait a little in this cold, before dad found me. When we were driving he was complaining on delays and misinformation that made him going back and forth between Kraków and Katowice. I tried instead to tell a little bit about my trip, but I was too exhausted too fully commit to that. I had either way too much to share so I didn't have any hope that I will be able to comprehensible relate everything I would want to. I tried to make some photos of the snow, because I learned that it is only in proximity of Kraków and there's no snow in our region. I was in habit of sharing things and I knew that it will be something unusual for Nicha.

With all the delays we arrived home much later than I expected. Additionally, I had huge jet lag and I had to go to sleep quite early, basically I was still running on Indian time. But before I went to bed, I felt welcomed by mom, our big puppy dog and the cat. Despite the cold outside there was warmth. At the same time, all things here felt completely surreal, I couldn't quite believe that I'm here. I knew that I will be struggling with this feeling of dissociation for some time, but that is the price for the dream trip. I was happy for what I could experience and people I could meet there. I knew that I will return there, sooner or later.